Parenting in the City

11 Jan 2012 1 Comment

by jenflem in Christian Faith, Memphis, Missions, Motherhood

I’m currently reading Ten Ways to Destroy the Imagination of Your Child, and as much as I would like to be a “hip” parent, I find one section difficult to swallow even though I agree with it. This is because not only am I a big proponent for serving and dwelling in the city, but I am also a mom. Travis and I talk often about the dangers of the city now that we have little ones, and we often struggle with whether or not we want them to be exposed to the city and all of its troubles. The reality is as I am finding that efforts in sheltering them are futile. Memphis is a prime example of what happens when “good” parents move out of the city. Here is what I mean, and I’ll let Anthony Esolen, the author of Ten Ways, to explain:

As cities become more violent, good parents with children move away; but as good parents with children move away, cities become more violent. That is because children, roving over and across and under everything will see what felons do not want them to see, as children are in many ways more observant than grownups. Preaching safety to the child, safety above all, safety always, world without end, has the considerable advantage of instilling in him the expectation that life should be provided with boardwalks and handrails. Such a child will never go for a walk in the woods if he lives in the country, and, even if our cities were better than sinkholes, will not walk down an alley if he lives in the city…..

If a child must go to the city, then, it should be with gates and barriers provided. He should be encouraged to believe that only certain sections of the city really count—the ones with high-toned coffee shops, for instance. Let him meet men of the road–what are now called, with insufferable condescension, the “homeless”—but only in sanctioned school functions, or at sanctioned philanthropic events, where everyone will give the expected response to the expected questions, and all fear and degradation and sin and romance will be leached out. Encourage him to think that the overschooled performers of high culture at the city amphitheater are the real urbanites, not the man who works for the bus company and lives at the back of a hardware store, or the old lady who sweeps the streets in front of the old Lutheran Church. Let him “do” the city, but not wander in it, let alone live there” (pp. 43-44).

So, this is my dilemma, but not really because here I am living in the city with all of its troubles and glory. May my children see its redeeming qualities as well as its brokenness, all the while discovering Christ and the whole gospel story.